Thursday, January 10, 2013

Stupid questions people usually ask in obvious situations... and irritated answers

1. At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/friends...
Stupid Question:-

Hey, what are you doing here?
Answer:-

Don't u know, I sell tickets in black over here..

2. In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet...

Stupid Question:-

Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer:-

No, not at all, I'm on local anesthesia.....why don't you try again.

3. At a funeral: One of the teary-eyed people ask...

Stupid Question:-

Why, why him, of all people.
Answer:-

Why? Would it rather have been you?

4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter

Stupid Question:-

Is ! the "Butter Paneer Masala" dish good??
Answer:-

No, its terrible and made of adulterated cement. We occasionally also spit in it.

5. At a family get-together: When some distant aunt meets you after years...

Stupid Question:-
Munna, Chickoo, you've become so big.
Answer:-

Well you haven't particularly shrunk yourself.

6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask...

Stupid Question:-

Is the guy you're marrying good?
Answer:-

No,he's a miserable wife-beating , insensitive lout...it's just the money.

7. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call...

Stupid Question:-

Sorry. were you sleeping?
Answer:-

No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marry or not. You thought I was sleeping....you dumb witted moron.

8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair...

Stupid Question:-

Hey have you had a haircut?
Answer:-
No, its autumn and I'm shedding......

9. At the dentist when he's sticking pointed objects in your mouth...

Stupid Question:-

Tell me if it hurts?
Answer:-

No it wont. It will just bleed.

10. You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman asks...

Stupid Question:-

Oh, so you smoke.
Answer:-

Gosh, it's a miracle .......it was a piece of chalk and now it's in flames!!!

 

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